How to Raise your Self-Esteem From Within
April 29, 2010
Low self-esteem can make life miserable. It affects our confidence and our general outlook. But what we may not realize is that building our self-esteem is up to us.
It’s easy to blame others for our self-esteem problems. But while it’s true that the way that others treat us can have an effect on our self-esteem, we can find it within ourselves to rise above it. They do call it “self” esteem for a reason, after all.
The best thing we can do when other people are negatively affecting our self-esteem is to stay away from them. But doing that requires some self-esteem on our part, because we must feel that we are worthy of being treated well. It can be a vicious cycle if we let it.
How Can I Improve My Self-Esteem on My Own?
Those with very low self-esteem often do not feel motivated to change. But improving your self-esteem requires some changes in your way of thinking. Even a small step in the right direction is a start.
One way to get started working on your self-esteem is to make a list of the things you like about yourself. It’s easy to say that there is nothing you like about yourself, but if you think about it, you’re bound to come up with something. Are you good at tennis? Do you make great lasagna? Are you good at crafts? If you try, you can probably come up with several things that you like about yourself. Write them down. Then when you start having negative thoughts about yourself, take a look at that list and turn those negative thoughts into positive ones.
Negativity toward one’s self is a big component of low self-esteem, but the list of things you like about yourself can help combat it. Making a habit of this will eventually result in more positive thoughts coming naturally.
Other Self-Esteem Boosters
Mastering new things can work wonders for your self-esteem. Taking up a new hobby or enrolling in classes at the local college will give you less time to focus on the negative things you see in yourself. These things will also give you a sense of accomplishment, which is great for your self-esteem.
Taking care of yourself is also good for self-esteem. Eating right, exercising, and getting enough sleep all help to boost your mood, improve your immune systems, get your body in better shape, and allow you to think more clearly. They also make it easier for you to fight off stress. These factors are all conducive to higher self-esteem.
Taking responsibility for your own self-esteem is the key to raising it. If you feel good about yourself from within, it won’t make as much of a difference if others are negative toward you.
Tips To Boost Self Esteem
April 26, 2010
Self-esteem is defined as the way a person feels and thinks about him or herself. It is believed that self-esteem is developed during the childhood years and is largely affected by how one has been treated by the people surrounding him or her particularly his or her parents.
Many individuals suffer from low-esteem. When someone has low self-esteem it affects all facets of his or her life. Low self-esteem can have adverse effects in ones confidence, ability to build and maintain friendships and romantic relationships, career development or work performance. It could also lead to unhappiness and a generally unsatisfactory life. Self-esteem is rooted in ones belief in ones self. When ones doubts or has uncertainties when it comes to his or her capacities then he or she is likely to be suffering from low self-esteem.
Low self esteem affects many people and fortunately there are many ways to build self-esteem. One of the most effective of these ways is to work to have a more positive self image. A positive self image simply means an agreeable or favorable view of ones self including ones talents and abilities. In other words, to have a healthy self-esteem one must be able to like or love him or herself.
Another way to boost self esteem is to get rid of negative thoughts. How do you this? The most important thing is to be able to recognize a negative thought as it enters your mind. One cannot simply will a negative thought away. The most effective way to dispel negative thoughts is to replace them with positive ones. If, for example, you are beginning to have doubts. Then simply replace these doubtful thoughts with thoughts of confidence and belief.
It is important that you change the negative thought immediately and not let it linger in your mind. If a negative though stays in the mind for a long time then there is the possibility that it could turn into a habit. In which case, it would be very difficult to dispel or get rid of it.
Another powerful way to deal with negative thoughts and thus build self-esteem is through positive affirmations. These are words that suggest positive beliefs and ideas and are meant to be read or recited repeatedly. One of the most popular affirmation goes like this: In every day, in every way I am getting better and better. If you are having negative thoughts and are suffering from low self-esteem then try to say this affirmation to yourself several times throughout the day.
Finally, you can also boost self esteem by hanging out with positive and supportive friends and relatives. This is probably the most effective way of improving ones self-esteem. The words of encouragement and even praises of these individuals can do wonders to your self-esteem. Their love and understanding is definitely more powerful than any affirmation or positive thought. Sometimes just knowing that somebody believes in you makes you believe in yourself also.
4 Things I Can Do For You As Your Coach
April 25, 2010
I just wanted to spread the word about my life coaching services and what I can do to help just about anyone. No, I’m not suited for every client but the right coach/client combination is such powerful tool and this is why I offer free consultations to see if you and I would be a good fit.
Many people aren’t sure what I can do for them as a coach. Over the 8 years that I’ve been a life coach, I’ve heard different variations of the following questions and statements a lot:
Well, here are just 4 things that I as your coach can help you work on and achieve:
1 – Make personal changes that reduce stress and simplify your life. Let’s face it – at times we must make changes in our work live and/or personal life so that things run smoother. As your coach I will work with you to help you incorporate new tools, different attitudes and we will work to “tweak” certain situations so that your life is more simplistic and less stressed. Many times you are too close to a concern that you have and you may not be able to “see” things that you can change in order to live the live that you desire to live.
2 - Work through a career or life transition. Some life and work transitions can be daunting, even for the strongest person. With me as your coach, you don’t have to go at it alone. I will listen to you, your concerns and your desires and I work with you to make the changes as smooth as possible. Whether it is a new job, changes in your relationship with others or something else, I can help you reach that “next phase” in your life.
3 – Achieve better work/life balance. As you may already know or can imagine… if your work life and personal life are out of balance, your stress may be running high. I can help you achieve better balance between your work and personal life. With me working at your side, you can gain better balance in your life — and give yourself the time to do the things that are most important to you. I can help you to prioritize the items on your to do lists, work on your time management techniques and carve out more time to do what you enjoy. There are only 24 hours in each day and I can help you make the most out of every one of those hours.
4 – Build your confidence and self-esteem. A strong self esteem is the key to your overall well being and happiness. If you have low confidence or low self esteem you will find it nearly impossible to be the person you could be and your happiness will always be limited. With me as your coach I can work with you to boost your self esteem and confidence. I can help you see why you’re suffering from low self esteem, help you get to the root of it, and help you overcome it. You can use my expertise to get started on the road to a confident new you and start living the life you’ve always dreamed of.
These are just 4 ways that I as your coach, can help you. There are many more ways that you can utilize my services so feel free to grab your free consultation today and talk to me at your convenience.
Boosting Self Esteem Boosts Your Success
April 22, 2010
We may not realize it, but self-esteem is a great determinant of whether or not we will be a success in life or not. Why? Because self-esteem, or the way we view ourselves, including ours skills and our talents, affect our thoughts. And these thoughts turn into actions.
Taking actions are very important. Actions are the ones who move us closer to our dreams. If you have dreams and goals in life and you realize that you are not moving towards them then maybe you are not taking any action s or you are taking the wrong ones. What most people are not aware of is that thoughts and actions are linked. Having positive thoughts leads to positive actions in the same way that negative thoughts can lead to inaction or negative actions.
Achieving your goals and making your dreams come true naturally takes time. And the thing that can give you the proper drive or push is high self-esteem. High self-esteem can provide you the determination and personal power needed for you to take actions towards the achievements of your goals. Consequently, low-self esteem is one of biggest blocks to a person’s success. Why? Because when a person has low self-esteem it is more difficult for him or her to perform the right actions to achieve their goals.
Simply put, self-esteem refers to how a person looks at one self. If one looks at him or herself in a positive way then he or she has high self-esteem. On the other had, if a person ha a negative view of him or herself in including his or her abilities, then he or she definitely has low self-esteem.
One of the things that lower self esteem is criticism. The worst kind of criticisms is the one that comes from you. When you always criticize yourself it can lead to having feelings of self doubt.
If there is one greatest killer of dreams known to man it is a negative thought. Nothing can be more destructive. Do not tell yourself that “I can’t.” or “that’s impossible.” Instead, believe that anything is possible and that you can achieve anything.
So how do you build self-esteem? Since thoughts are the roots of feelings and actions then you must always make sure that your thoughts are positive and beneficial. Instead of focusing on your failures and mistakes, why don’t you take notice of your achievements? This is not vanity. It is simply recognizing the things that you have done in the past and acknowledging your abilities.
Everyone has his or her own share of accomplishments in life. The best thing that you can do is to get a piece of paper and list down your accomplishments for the last years. Remember all the challenges that you were able to hurdle and the obstacles you have been able to overcome. You will be surprised to know that you have achieved many things in your life already. In moments of great doubt, you can always refer back to this list and remember your accomplishments. You can continue to add to this list as you achieve more in life.
Always remember that there is a strong connection between self-esteem and success, so do anything that you can to improve the quality of your thoughts for it determines your future success.
Reaching Goals After a Setback
April 18, 2010
It is a common occurrence to encounter setbacks when pursuing a goal. Setbacks and challenges are a natural activity in people’s lives and they do happen – more often than we would like to see. These difficulties should not paralyze us though. There is more than one way in facing a setback. We do not always have to give in. Everyone has a choice to either change the difficulty of any situation or change yourself to be able to deal with the difficulty.
Every time you find yourself faced with a challenge that blocks you from completing your goal, know that you can always change things around so that you are at an advantage. Ask yourself a question that is phrased in a positive way. Doing so allows your mind to come up with a solution to help you re-focus. For example, when things go wrong, ask yourself, “Is there a lesson to be learned in this unfortunate situation?” Your mind will naturally look for the positive instead of focusing on the negative.
When you are faced with a setback, make sure to acknowledge it. Just because you do not recognize it, doesn’t mean that it does not exist or it will go away. Life will not end just because you are faced with a setback. Instead of feeling defeated, ask yourself these questions:
• Is there any positive side to this setback?
• Can I learn anything from this setback?
• How can I make this a positive experience instead?
• What steps can I take to overcome this challenge?
• How can I benefit from this experience?
Setbacks are just challenges that are sent our way to make life more exciting. Everyone in the world experiences setbacks. They are just bumps in the road that may slow us down but will still lead us to our final destination. If you have anything that you feel sets you back, just change your thinking – stay positive, re-focus and you will surely come up with another way to achieve your goals.
As a personal life coach, I can help you to reach your goals, overcome your setbacks and be the best that you can be !
What’s Stopping You From Being Your Best?
April 15, 2010
Do you have dreams and desires inside of you that you would love reach but never really tried to go for them? Or have you set goals but gave up before you even came close to reaching them? Do you often look at people who are where you want to be in life and wonder how they got there and why you can’t seem to ever get anything you desire?
If you answered yes to any of those questions above, the answer you seek may be in the paragraphs below.
One of the biggest reasons most people fail to reach their goals, dreams and desires is due to FEAR. Yes, that is right. Fear of failure, fear of looking foolish, and yes, even fear of being at the top or being successful often stops us in our tracks and keeps us from reaching our full potential.
As a personal life coach, I often have the opportunity to speak to a wide variety of people from various walks of life and backgrounds. My experience has shown that the main reason most people are not living their dreams is due to fear. Those fears may be different for each person, but the main culprit is fear.
The reasons we have fear are far and wide from one individual to the next. Perhaps you know its fear that stops you from reaching out and going for your goals or dreams, but you don’t know where that fear comes from or how to overcome it.
Wouldn’t you like to see your dreams and desires come to fruition? Your dreams don’t have to be for the future or for someone else. You have them because you want them now and you want them for yourself.
Whether you’re goals are small like starting a new project for your business or whether they’re big like owning your dream home or winning an Olympic medal, you CAN learn to overcome your fears so you CAN live the life you’ve always dreamed of.
As a personal life coach, I can help you discover what your fears are, where they came from and how to overcome them. Don’t let fear stop you any longer from being the best that you can be!
Take Time Out!
April 8, 2010
At some point in your hectic life, you may feel like screaming “Stop the world, I want to get off!” Life can come at you in a blur at times. It’s at those moments you want to sit back and let the world go by.
Taking time to refresh yourself is extremely important in today’s hurried pace. Rather than trying to ‘keep up with the Joneses,’ why not make a change to your life for the better. Learn to step back on a regular basis and enjoy a day of peace and quiet.
* Do you like to read but never find time to do it? How long has it been since you’ve simply lost yourself in a book? Set aside time each week to do just that. Give yourself permission to spend a couple of hours delving into the newest novel by your favorite author. Or go back and re-read one of your favorite books. Curl up with a cup of coffee or hot tea and allow yourself to get lost in the pages. You’ll feel refreshed and more ready to face your busy schedule once you’ve taken a break.
* When was the last time your family took a vacation? How about a long weekend where you could get away from your normal schedule? If you live close to the beach, setting aside time to enjoy the sunshine and the sound of the waves may be just what your family needs to get rejuvenated.
* Take a walk during your lunch hour instead of hurrying to eat and get back to work. Take your full allotted time so you can relax a little bit before rejoining the rat race. Spend some time sitting on a bench watching the people passing by. Enjoy the warmth of the sun and the fresh air. You’ll be amazed at how awake you are when you return to work.
* Head to the gym when you feel the pressure and stress of a busy schedule getting the best of you. Not only will exercise strengthen your muscles, it will also help reduce the effects of stress you may be feeling. Does this mean you have to spend hours at the gym to get these benefits? Of course not. However, a minimum of 30 minutes three days a week is recommended to get the most benefit.
* Take the time to do some research on the internet to see if there are meditation retreats in your area. What’s a meditation retreat? They are short trips to facilities which are known for being quiet. This could be a convent or monastery but could also be a campground in the mountains. The point is to take the time away from your stress-filled days to reconnect with your own hopes and dreams by spending time in meditation.
When your world is going crazy and there doesn’t seem to be enough time to breathe, getting away to sit back and let the world go by can be what you need most. Give it a try! Use one of the above ideas to help you step back from your hurried life and bring back a sense of peace and sanity.
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5 Ways To Beat Stress
April 5, 2010
Stress is a natural human reaction to situations that life throws at us when we’re not expecting it. It can cause physical as well as psychological problems and can escalate to severe anxiety attacks if those problems are not met head on.
One of the first treatments recommended for those with severe stress problems is some type of medication to help alleviate the symptoms they’re experiencing. The medications don’t work for everyone and it’s not an easily embraced idea for others who don’t care for the side effects those medications cause.
Those who don’t want to go the medication route will be happy to know there are other ways to beat stress that don’t involve the act of popping pills every day. There are several different options to choose from to lessen the negative consequences stress can bring.
Taking a long walk to clear your head is one of the best ways to alleviate stress. Walking is an excellent form of exercise for your body as well as your mind. You can walk out your frustration so that you’ll be able to come back refreshed and tackle your problems again.
Give your mind a break with soft, relaxing music. Our brains take in lots of information from the things that we read, hear and see every second of every day. Your brain is an amazing organ, but it’s not immune to overloads.
The overload can cause stress to escalate and bring on a number of problems for us, so give it a break. Listening to relaxing music will ease the racing thoughts and help us to think clearly when we return to our problems.
Find a hobby to do and be sure to make time for it at least once a week. Everyone needs to get out of the mindset of having to deal with problems and decisions within our lives. By giving yourself something else to focus on, you can gain a sense of accomplishment in an area of your life where your job and financial situation may not be up to par.
You could start a craft project, go golfing or find something else you know you’ll enjoy doing. Another option you could try is to treat yourself to a massage. Stress can cause your muscles to tighten and ache, making your stress worse. A massage can loosen up those muscles, which will loosen up your mind and you can then be ready to face your life again refreshed and renewed.
Don’t be afraid to let your emotions surface. If you’re so stressed that you want to cry, then let those tears flow. Built up stress has to come out somehow, so it’s a lot safer to let it out through tears than to wait until it explodes into uncontrollable anger.
If anger is your first reaction to the stress, let it come out in a controlled situation like a punching bag. Control your stress before it starts to take control of you. Medications are one answer to alleviating the stress, but they’re not the only answer. Find what works best for you and beat that stress in your life.
As a Life Coach, it is my passion to help you overcome and manage stress. Click here for your free consultation.
Your Health and Stress
April 2, 2010
Into every life a little stress must fall. When the stress reaches higher than normal levels on a regular basis, your health can start to be affected. Moms may look invincible or even think they are invincible but it’s not true. Stress and good health don’t mix.
Stress is our body’s response to outside stimuli. Sure that sounds good, but it doesn’t mean very much. When you come home from a hard day at work and the sink is full of dishes, the laundry room is piled high with clothing, and the sink in the bathroom has been dripping all day, your blood pressure begins to rise.
The first person who says something to you usually gets to hear about your frustration. Or, they get to see you run bawling to the bedroom and shut the door. This is stress.
Moms, we have to protect our health. If the above scenario is typical of your daily life, watch out. You need to cease and desist before you end up in bed or the loony bin. Popping pills is not a long-term solution to the side effects you are experiencing from your stress. Antacids and headache medication is not the answer.
Did you know that too much pain medication can irritate your digestive system? Your body will fight back with bowel trouble or worse. There’s a reason that labels tell you not to exceed a specified dose in twenty-four hours. We’ve go to stop abusing our bodies.
Are you a stress eater – increasing your caloric intake as your stress increases? I am. I didn’t know it until I had gained about twenty pounds. Stress can lead to some unhealthy ways of coping. My fix was peanut butter cups. Do you know how many calories are in those things? I would shield my eyes from the nutritional information. It’s a wonder I didn’t explode.
Stress can lead to poor eating habits. Overeating or eating the wrong things can lead to obesity, diabetes, high cholesterol, and high blood pressure. These illnesses can lead to heart disease and stroke. Basically, we’re talking about a premature death. That is not an option for you, mom.
Stress can also cause ulcers, migraine headaches, and depression. These conditions can be avoided when we take better care of ourselves. Enlist the aid of your spouse, parents, sisters, brothers, and friends. You are not the first one to suffer stress and you will not be the last. Living with it is not an option.
As a mom, your children can even help you. How can that purple-faced person with jam all over himself help you? Kiss his jam stained face until all the jam is gone. Jump on the bed with him. Snuggle together with some books and let all the day’s worries stay outside that door.
He may be a reason for some of the stress, but he is also the joy of your life. You endure because of his angelic face. Be there for him when he grows up by learning to cope with stress now.
